This is going to be harder than I thought

I've finally arrived at Fuller. I drove down to LA last Sunday in my friend's car (it's the same car that I've been driving for this past month). They let me borrow it for this quarter. Major props to them! I really appreciated their generosity to me. It gives me more time to find a car or move closer to school and forego owning a car. We'll see what happens.

My current accomodations are great! I'm renting a room in a single family house in a gated community. It's got a gym, basketball & tennis courts, swimming pool, and a clubhouse. It's like I'm living in a resort! I love it! The commute is about 1 hr in the morning and about 40 min coming home depending on time and traffic. I have to go through downtown LA, which gets really congested because people are going in and out of there for work. It's not that bad of a commute. Sure, I'd love for it to be shorter and smoother but hey, that's just how it goes. No worries.

My first week at Fuller has been really challenging (and I haven't even started my classes yet!). I'm commuting and not living amongst other Fuller students so I feel like I'm missing out on the constant action amongst those who live close to school. I'm getting adjusted to going back to school. It turns out most of the new students are straight out graduates from undergrad so they're between the ages of 22-24. I feel really old compared to these guys. Many of them also come from private Christian schools. They seem to either be from the northwest or Minnesota. And I'd say about 80% of them are white. I think that's been the biggest shocker.

I didn't expect Fuller to be lacking in such racial diversity. It was a real big expecation of mine that it would be. And also, I am coming from Hong Kong where for the past 2.5 years I was amongst people who look like me. It was a real neat thing living in a place where I looked like everyone else because that just doesn't happen here in America. For once in my life, I fit in racially.

So here I am, 28 years old, I worked in a non-ministry profession for three years and did two years of ministry, I've lived abroad for 2.5 years, am American-born-Chinese so I live with two cultures inside me, went to public schools all of my life, and have travelled and seen many different parts of this world. I don't feel like I can connect with my classmates because I keep thinking that I'm so different from them and how, just how will they connect with me? Do they want to connect with me? Geez, I've already jokingly been called "old" a few times this week. Wonderful, just wonderful. At this point, I contemplate foregoing trying to build any relationships with my classmates and just burying myself in my books these next two or three years. But really, how could I do that? Don't get me wrong, everyone's really nice and we are all there to learn and grow so we do have that common bond. I'm lucky that I already have friends from university who live here in LA now and with whom I'll be able to reconnect with. Plus, I can always escape to San Diego to see my beloved familia.

I believe the Lord has led me into the wilderness these next few years. I think he's really going to work me over some and do some healing inside me as well. I think of this verse a lot now:

Remember how the LORD your God led you all the way in the desert these forty years, to humble you and to test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commands.
-Deuteronomy 8.2

I think he's going to do exactly that to me for these next few years. He's going to get into more places in my life that I need to be tested and worked on. It's going to be hard. But, at least I know this is the place that I need to be. I do not regret coming here and leaving Hong Kong. I know the Lord has things in store for me here but it will take some serious work, heartache and perseverence to get through. I also know that the Lord is with me and goes before me as well. Sorry if this post is a bit scatter-brained but I can't say that I've got it all together right now.

Thanks to all of you who've posted comments. I really appreciate hearing your thoughts and knowing that you're reading my entries. It means a lot to me.

Peace be with you.

Awaiting my next departure

My time to start at Fuller is coming and I'm so stoked for it! I can't wait to start reading and writing for class! I know, it sounds mental that I'm looking forward to writing but I really am. When I write I feel like I can go on and on and on and on and not worry about when to stop (kind of like this blog entry). But I'm really apprenhensive about thinking. We're going to have to think about some serious things, things that I really don't often think about nor have had to articulate to others in writing in a clear and thoughtful manner. It's gonna be tough but it's gonna be so good.

I still don't have a car of my own yet and I'm going down to LA this weekend. I'm kinda freaked about that. I've found it to be quite a stressful experience shopping for a used car. There are so many things to watch out for and to check out. And plus, cars aren't small expenses. They cost so much to maintain like buying gas, which is at USD $3/gallon now, maintenance, insurance, time spent driving, accidents, and more. I miss the wonderful public transit of Hong Kong: get on the bus or MTR and just go. You don't have to think about anything.

I can't believe I just finished four weeks with the City of Palo Alto doing the exact same stuff I did before I left for Hong Kong. It's surreal. It's like I took a 2.5 year sabbatical from planning to live in Hong Kong and work for ECC and have since just come back and started things up again. Weird. And things haven't really changed at the City. Many of my same cool co-workers are still there and many of the zoning codes haven't changed. I was on the phone with an client answering some of her questions and I was able to rattle off some sort of coherent answer. After hanging up, my co-worker who'd overheard the entire conversation said that I haven't lost my knowledge at all. Scary to think that I still remember side yard setback distances, height limitations, protective tree regulations, and more.

Being back with the City made me appreciate my old job back at ECC even more. You all know that I loved it but now, I love it even more! So much of planning job is enforcing the law and telling people, "No. Fix it." It's the law so you must abide by it. I've learned that the law doesn't get any simpler, only stricter and more complicated. Law begs for more law. So when does it end? Many thoughts on that...

It's been wonderful seeing so many old friends and family in my time here. I've been hanging out a whole lot with my beloved family. It's been so great. Walking down the street to my cousin's place to walk their dog. Chill'n with my sister while she was home. Seeing old friends. I got to go to a Giant's game. Eat at Hunan homes, our regular Sunday afternoon Chinese restaurant we'd go to after church.

Golf Update
Vic and I played 15 holes on Sunday afternoon. It was sooo great! We walked on, just the two of us at San Jose Muni. Through those fifteen holes I was playing about +1.5 strokes over par per hole. I think I parred three holes! It seemed I was quite on fire (for me). Maybe a little too on fire...

On the 12th hole I teed off thinking the group in front of us was too far out of my reach of my tee shot. I was wrong. I think I hit my tee shot about 230 yards straight down the fairway and it landed right in front of one of the golfers. I felt pretty bad about that and yelled sorry about that one. Then on my second shot I hit a great 3-iron probably 200 yards straight down and I could see it heading for the same group in front of us again so I yelled "fore!" to warn them. I couldn't believe it! Twice in a row! I felt really bad about that. Well, as I approached my ball one of the guys came up to me, visibly tense and wanting a few words with me so as soon as I thought he was within earshot I started apologizing profusely. He was pretty annoyed to say the least but he took my apology and thankfully, he didn't clobber me. So note to self: it's better to wait to make sure the foursome ahead is well out of range before hitting and it never hurts to apologize too much, especially if you think you've almost hit the guy's girlfriend. Yeah, not a good thing.

My prop's go out to Vic. She played well. She hit some really good shots and sank a couple great putts. I look forward to teeing it up with her again in San Diego (hopefully at Torrey Pines. Very nice!).

Elevator Observations
I think the best elevator I've found has got to be the new elevators recently installed into the City of Palo Alto's City Hall. They are fast, they open and close fast, and the close door button actually works when you push it! Finally, my kind of lift!

My Fellow Rooters
Last night I had dinner with my good friends from my 2002 Roots trip. It was on that trip that I got the idea to move to Hong Kong. It was totally great seeing them and hearing about what they're all doing, hearing about this summer's trip, and what we're all planning on doing in the future. They're a great bunch.

Pictures
Many of you have requested that I post more pictures. I'd love to except my digital camera died my first week back in the states. I need to replace it as soon as possible. So if you have any recommendations on digital cameras, I'm all ears!

Rooters

Rooters. Jason, Brian, Wayie, Brian, Al.